WHAT IF??
What if BONANNI couldn't croon
And SOLLIS couldn't cheer;
Suppose HERBY rocketed to the moon
Or KATZINGER'S voice we'd hear?
What if LARRY never campaigned
Or GERRY missed a cue;
Suppose that JOE GAUNT ever complained
Or SID never said, "What's new?"
Suppose that RENEE had black hair
Or BUNNY weren't so pretty;
What if SULLIVAN got to be Mayor
Or MARILYN were not witty?
What if DiMEO played the cello
Or COHAN forgot to laugh;
Suppose that GARRETT'S voice weren't mellow
Or JACKIE were minus BILLIE her better half?
What if JEANETTE wore no ring
Or RUSSELL JACKSON never smiled;
What if PREVITI didn't sing
Or MUNYAN didn't drive the boys wild?
What if PHYLLIS never had a party
Or MARKMAN hadn't a pal;
What if our house were designed by MARTY
Or LAOMA weren't the cutest gal?
What if RAY weren't called "Koolu"
Or RALPH weren't being congratulated;
What if GALLAGHERwere ever blue
Or EILEEN and JOY were really related?
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WHAT IF
What if CLEMENT weren't so tall
Or REALE without a girl was seen;
What if JANE were not so small
Or FREEDMAN weren't called Imogene?
What if ORIGLIO weren't so neat
Or SUBIN forgot to play tennis;
What if OLLIE weren't so sweet
Or CARLIN became your dentist?
What if ROSARY missed a key
Or HORKITZ never sold those ads;
Suppose our candidates hadn't EARL LEE
Or LIZ were not so crazy 'bout cats?
What if MITTELMAN weren't called "Cat"
Or CHRISTENSEN'S car would stall;
Suppose BUTCH had no baseball bat
Or BLUM played at Carnegie Hall?
What if ELLMAN weren't so bright
Or FOREMAN lost a dimple;
Or STEWART of traffic lost her fright
Or WEINFELD found Spanish simple?
What if IRELAND were not with POOL
Or RACO never ate a meal;
Or MACCAGNANO weren't so cool
Or SPITALNICK never showed a reel?
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© 2007 Barry L. Rich 01/24/2007